If you want to live long, by Bisi Adeleye-Fayemi
If you want to live long
Master the art of counting one to ten whenever someone upsets you
If you are still not calm after ten
Count to twenty
If you want to live long
Know where witches and wizards live
They don’t live in your village
It is not your stepmother or mother-in-law
I am sure they get on your nerves but it does not make them witches
Your Uncle might be cantankerous
It does not mean he wants you dead
Afterall, if you die, who will bury him?
If you want to live long
Know that witches and wizards live in mostly two places
They are either in that cold, anonymous, unfeeling space online
Or they are simply living in your head rent free
If you want to live long
Learn how to love yourself
Then you can love others in any order you desire
If you do not love yourself
You will spend a lifetime loving weapons fashioned against you
If you want to live long
You need the skin of a rhinoceros
The resilience of a bear
The gentleness of a dove
The strength of a lion
The work ethic of an ant
The loyalty of a dog, or cat if you prefer
The memory of an elephant
If animals are not your thing
Perhaps you might consider the forgiving spirit of Mandela
The wisdom of Solomon
The courage of Daniel
The resourcefulness of Jonah – he had a good explanation for being missing for three days and three nights
I however do not recommend this because your spouse might have an issue with your alibi
But I digress
If you want to live long
You need to mind your own business
Keep people away from your business
Learn how to see, hear, talk and smell
How to be blind, deaf, dumb and smell roses when others smell shit
And when you smell something foul, keep it to yourself but figure out the source
If you want to live long
Know when to fight
Know when to live to fight another day
Know when to give
Know when to withhold
Know what can be healed
Know what can’t be cured
If you want to live long
Read for the same reasons you eat
It will keep you alive and healthy
If you want to live long
Learn the value of things
There are things money can by aplenty
Enjoy them, they might make your life easier
There are things money can’t buy
They are simply priceless
Spend your life knowing what they are
If you find out what they are
You might live a little longer
If you want to live long
Know that whenever you wake up is your morning
And be grateful to have survived the uncertainties of the night
If you want to live long
Know that it is a good thing to spend many years in this realm
It is even better to have spent them well.
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المصدر: Vanguard (NG)